Tax quotes for Tax time

It’s that time of the year again. I dislike this time of the year for just one reason — the amount of hassle and time involved in pulling together papers for taxes. It’s worse when you have multiple entities to deal with. I once asked an accountant why the US tax system is so screwed up. His response was beautiful: “Job security.” The odds that the tax system here will ever be simplified is so remote that hell will freeze over first.

I received the following quotes in an email from my personal tax accountant, Buzz Rose from B. Rose CPA. I enjoyed reading them, and so figured they would be worth sharing here (with Buzz’s permission of course):

“Worried about an IRS audit? Avoid what’s called a red flag. That’s something the IRS always looks for. For example, let’s say you have some money left in your bank account after paying taxes. That’s a red flag.”
Jay Leno

“The only difference between a taxman and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.”
Mark Twain

“The difference between death and taxes is death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”
Will Rogers

“Two years ago it was impossible to get through on the phone to the IRS. Now it’s just hard to get through. That’s progress.”
Charles Rossotti (former IRS Commissioner)

” A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.”
G. Gordon Liddy

“Day in and day out, your tax accountant can make or lose you more money than any single person in your life, with the possible exception of your kids.”
Harvey Mackay

“If you get up early, work late, and pay your taxes, you will get ahead – if you strike oil.”
J. Paul Getty

“If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract – teach him to deduct.”
Fran Lebowitz

“The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward.”
John Maynard Keynes

“I love America, but I can’t spend the whole year here. I can’t afford the taxes.”
Mick Jagger

“On my income tax 1040 it says ‘Check this box if you are blind.’ I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away.”
Tom Lehrer

” I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?”
Milton Berle

“The taxpayer – that’s someone who works for the federal government but doesn’t have to take the civil service examination.”
Ronald Reagan

“The income tax created more criminals than any other single act of government.”
Barry Goldwater

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Twitter updates for 2010-03-17

  • RT @dirkriehle: @Stanford on why Sigourney Weaver is wearing a Stanford shirt in Avatar: http://bit.ly/b1AlPX #
  • How does a company called 'Starbucks' get away w/having it's coffee sizes be Tall/Grande/Venti? Related: SBUX decoder – http://k9.vc/9bEtRm #
  • Not that simple. RT @venturehacks: The only reason investors say โ€˜noโ€™ is because you haven't figured out how to get far enough on your own. #
  • Just nominated Palo Alto for @Google's FTTH trial. My reasons: 1) It would rock, 2) PA has fiber installed, 3) Larry Page would like it ๐Ÿ™‚ #
  • RT @Ross: Nominate Palo Alto for the @google fiber to the home trial. B/C we botched up our first attempt so badly http://twurl.nl/uscp6x #
  • At the MIT/Stanford VLAB event on the Internet of Things: Sensors Everywhere โ€” at Stanford Graduate School of Business http://gowal.la/s/eXD #
  • RT @cdixon: true RT @garrytan "founders worry too much about startups in Techcrunch. Your competitor is the back button" http://post.ly/TDwm #
  • Lunch with @tbrant. Love that Twitter helps me meet interesting people. โ€” at Thaiphoon http://gowal.la/s/BVX #
  • Comcast site says: 'We're sorry, the system could not process your request at this time.' All I'm trying to do is look at the bill! #ugh #
  • Curious how many startups still maintain paper receipts/files vs how many go all electronic. What do you do? #receipts #accounting #
  • .@danprimack Interesting post http://bit.ly/bIayhy Now I get to ask lawyers WHY they want to file a Form D. Esp since it costs $$s to file. #
  • RT @msuster: Twitter Networks are Different than Social Networks http://bothsid.es/5bL #
  • Problem w/ US #healthcare isn't just about insurance – it's also about healthcare cost. No accountability or transparency #hcr #
  • <no words> RT @reachanika: I'm all bundled up and ready to go outside http://twitpic.com/18ui8h #

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